Annie's Song

  "Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father's house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also." John 14:1 - 3 Ann Patricia Rupp May 13, 1946 - July 20, 2023 In my Father's house.... these are the verses my dad chose for mom when the time comes to have her memorial service. Honestly, I feel sort of numb. Like it's not really real. Yet I know that when I go to visit mom and dad, my mother will not be there.   This is how I think of mom. Ann/mom was most definitely the heart of her home. She always had the warmest smile, the most welcoming demeanor. She wanted her family and friends to feel embraced and comfortable; loved and fed. Nourished body and soul. She had a very generous spirit. She loved giving gifts even on a day (like Mother's Day) whe

  "You have put gladness in my heart..." Psalm 4:7a "Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!" Philippians 4:4 I endeavor not to pluck verses from the Bible out of their context. However, Psalm 4:7 perfectly captures the state of my soul after spending the afternoon and evening with mom and dad and my son, James, as well as, Ann's caregivers [Alma and Fany].  Other family members came and went during the afternoon/evening yesterday too. Mom was also up to FaceTime with my daughter, Katherine and her wife, Laura from across the pond in England. This post won't be long but it is filled with a heart of gratitude and wonder at the mercies of my Abba. When I visited mom and dad last Tuesday I truly thought we could be looking at Ann's final days, and especially considering what the hospitalist told us the Thursday mom came home from Mission Hospital. Due to the roller coaster-y nature of a person being at "end of life" stage, things ca

  "Hear my cry, O God; Attend to my prayer. From the end of the earth I will cry to You, When my heart is overwhelmed; Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For You have been a shelter for me, A strong tower from the enemy. I will abide in Your tabernacle forever; I will trust in the shelter of Your wings." Psalm 61: 1-4 A picture is worth a thousand words. Becket flew down from Portland on Saturday to see her Aunt Ann one more time. Me and my momma last Saturday 💗 Waiting is never easy and particularly so when there is no "appointment" ~ nothing marked on the calendar. It is simply waiting for something inevitable, and what makes that even more difficult is wondering what the wait will look like. The mystery and uncertainty of it. (We, as humans, feel a sense of control when we can anticipate how things are going to unfold.) I have felt this anxious uncertainty for less weighty matters: as I waited in line at California Adventure to ride Guardians of the Gala

  "The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.  He maketh me to lie down in green pastures:    He leadeth me beside the still waters.  He restoreth my soul: He leadeth me in paths of righteousness for his  name's sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the  shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; Thy rod and thy staff they  comfort me. " Psalm 23:1-4 My beautiful mom and her radiant smile. To all who have been on this journey with Ann/mom and our family since July 2022, I want to express my deepest gratitude for each one of you. Your words of encouragement and comfort; your generosity of spirit to contribute financially these past 11 months; your prayers (probably most precious of all) have uplifted us and have made a heart wrenching year easier to bear. I am fully confident your prayers have made a significant difference in Ann's life, my dad's life and for all of us who so dearly love her.  Although I knew the day would come when I woul